In Parashat Emor we read, “And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying:  But on the tenth of this seventh month, it is a day of atonement, it shall be a holy occasion for you; you shall afflict yourselves…”

Has there ever been anything more counter-intuitive?

You’re thinking…..Yom Kippur is the day we fast!

Jump to:

• the Erev Yom Kippur lunch menu

• the Erev Yom Kippur seudah hamafseket menu

• the break fast menu

But, a fast has a not-fast on either side, and it’s those meals we’re going to talk about.

all about Fasting:

Who should? Who shouldn’t? Why bother? How can I make it easier?

Fasting is hard. It’s supposed to be. We’re supposed to afflict ourselves.

Here’s what makes it easier…

Instead of gulping down some food before rushing out of the house to make it to Kol Nidre* on time, we could ease into the fast; we could prepare our bodies and our minds for a meaningful fast. It’s about creating sacred space within ourselves, to make room for God to enter. We honor God that way, in that we’re mirroring the tzimtzum that allowed for our very existence, when Ein Sof constricted to make room for creation. (Learn more about the tzimtzum and Ein Sof in my post on Challah as a Representation of Creation.)

What we choose to eat on the ninth of Tishrei, the day before Yom Kippur, is important for our physical as well as our spiritual health. We need to be nourished, we need to be sated without over-indulging, we need to eat foods that encourage clarity of mind.

Now, I’d love to be able to stake a claim to this concept. But I can’t. It’s a thing. It’s actually a mandate. There’s even a name for it: the seudah hamafseket, or literally, the separation meal.

Further, our sages teach that we should have two meals before we begin the fast, which often means a big, protein-rich lunch and a sustaining dairy-based meal in the early evening.

In the Torah, a few verses after being told to afflict ourselves on the 10th, we’re told that we are to afflict ourselves on the 9th of Tishrei, as well.

Does this mean we should fast for two days??

No. Actually, the mitzvah for the 9th is to eat. It’s considered a festive day because, even though we’re about to stand before God and be judged, we know that God is merciful and will sign and seal us for a good year and a sweet year. We’re supposed to have two festive meals before the fast.

The Talmud states that "Whoever eats and drinks on the 9th [of Tishrei], it is regarded as if he had fasted on both the 9th and the 10th."

Fasting for Yom Kippur can feel like a marathon, an achievement, a mountain to be climbed—a challenge that we can pat ourselves on the back for if we really make it all the way to sundown.

It can also feel like a punishment that we’ve proudly, willingly submitted to, a requirement for absolution of sin.

But fasting isn’t meant to be an endurance test—fasting is a vehicle.

Yom Kippur is all about atonement. At-one-ment. Reparing the rift that keeps us separated from God. It’s about doing teshuvah, returning.

Here’s a secret: the fast is not a punishment, it’s a gift, a gift that keeps on giving.

• Fasting presents us with the gift of discipline. We say we want to do teshuvah, we want to make changes in the way we move through this world. That’s a tall order, even with the help of HaShem. If we don’t have the discipline to control ourselves through one day of fasting, how will we be able to rein in our egos and change a deep-seated behavior that doesn’t serve us or the world?

• Fasting turns down the volume of our physical nature, our body-consciousness, and allows our spirit consciousness to rise to the surface.

Because the whole reason for the fast is for us to focus on the spiritual rather than on the physical.

This means that if fasting is harmful to us physically, interfering with our ability to keep our focus on the object of the day, we shouldn’t fast.

Who is not required to fast? The very young, the very old, the infirm, and the pregnant or nursing mother. If you find that the fast is making you ill, please eat something. But only a little, no more than is necessary.

Who should absolutely not fast? (I’ve seen people who shouldn’t be fasting but are determined to do so, literally pass out during the afternoon service.) I’m not a doctor, so please check with yours before deciding, but if you have a blood sugar issue, such as diabetes or hypoglycemia, fasting could be dangerous. Also, certain medications can make fasting dangerous. If you take medications that won’t interfere with a fast, by all means take a small sip of water when you swallow your pills. Again, if you have any medical condition, consult your physician before fasting. The bottom line here is common sense.

And that brings me back to So, what should we eat? The fast will be easier if we choose the right foods before it begins. Any article on the web that discusses this subject will pretty much tell you the same thing. If you have a caffein addiction, start slowly reducing the amount you drink for a week or so before the fast, getting down to a little morning decaf on the last day or so. Same with tobacco. (In fact…this just may be the moment to quit!) It’s hard to focus on prayer when you’ve got a splitting headache.

Don’t gorge yourself before a fast. It may seem logical to load up in advance, but that actually makes it harder. I find it’s better to eat a little less in the days preceding the fast because it wires my brain to want less food. Eat foods that are hydrating, like cucumbers, melons, all fruits and vegetables that have a high water content. Chia seeds are like the camels of the food world—they can hold an extraordinary amount of moisture. If you’re unfamiliar with them, check out my recipe for tropical chia pudding. It’s actually really good. Avoid foods that are salty or pickled. Stay away from deli meats and processed food in general. Also, limit alcohol, as it’s dehydrating. Stay away from heavy sweets for the last day or so. Think about the effect of blood sugar spikes and crashes…

the First Erev Yom Kippur Meal, to be served around noon

We’re going to go rogue here and have a creamy spinach soup with kreplach. I know that chicken soup is traditional, but we had chicken soup last week. The kreplach won’t mind floating in a sea of green.

Eating Kreplach on Erev Yom Kippur has deep mystical significance. Red is the color of blood; it represents pure Divine Judgement. White, the color of milk and love represents Divine Mercy. Kreplach, with their tender white dough on the outside and their red meat on the inside, represent our hope that on this Day of Atonement, God’s mercy and lovingkindness will wrap around God’s judgement and severity and have power over it.

For unbelievably easy and fabulous kreplach, take that brisket that was left over at Rosh Hashanah out of the freezer, chop it very finely, and you’ve got your filling.

If the brisket is gone, don’t fret. You can make wonderful kreplach with ground beef.

But…you can use the same recipe, substituting ground “Impossible” or “Beyond” meat for vegetarian kreplach that taste just like the real thing.

Kreplach filled with vegetable fillings are also wonderful. I love making them with mushrooms, and particularly with shiitake mushrooms because they’re so flavorful. It really gets that whole umami thing going.

I’ll serve the soup in small bowls with 2—3 kreplach in each. Then we’ll move on to the main event.

Chilean Sea Bass just might be my favorite fish. There were several years when it was, literally off the table, as it was being over-fished and in danger of being wiped out. Apparently that’s been sorted out, but I still don’t eat it often because it’s crazy expensive. That said, I suppose that only having it on special occasions is what makes it so special. Many people serve fish at the first pre-fast meal. If the sea bass is unavailable or just too “over the top,” the dish can also be made with any firm-fleshed white fish, such as haddock or cod.

One of the things that makes this recipe perfect for this meal is that, although it’s very posh and elegant, it’s quick and easy to put it together. So don’t let the long list of ingredients put you off. Also, it’s served in a light broth (the more liquids before the fast the better, right?) and the addition of fancy mushrooms add to the excitement of the dish. The menu may sound like a lot of food but I’m serving small portions. I don’t want us to be too full from lunch to enjoy our seudah hamafseket! Lunch will be at 11:30 and supper at 5:00.

I’ve also got a vegetarian version of this dish. It’s based on a wonderfully creative recipe for vegetarian fish and chips by Sam of “It doesn’t taste like chicken”. You can find her recipe here.

For this meal, I’m using her method of prepping the tofu, her marinade (adding a pinch of old bay seasoning—a flavor that wouldn’t work with British fish and chips, but it’s perfect, here), and her brilliant nori “fish skin.” I’m going to dredge it lightly in flour and sauté it in butter before using it in the same way that I’ll be using the Chilean sea bass in the above recipe.

For the vegetable—there always has to be a vegetable—I’m going to go with baby carrots. They’ll go well with the orange broth for the fish or tofu, and I’ve already got my greens in the soup.

I’ll dress the carrots with a little good olive oil mixed with a squeeze of fresh orange juice, a little honey, and a light sprinkling of garlic powder, salt, and pepper. Then I’ll massage all the ingredients onto the carrots to coat them evenly. They’ll roast in a single layer on a parchment-lined baking sheet at 425° for about 15 minutes, until they begin to char, just a bit.

A whole grain starch will finish the plate and add fiber, which helps to stave off hunger during the fast, and retains water, as well. I’m going with plain steamed black rice. I love the chewy texture and it will contrast beautifully with the white of the fish. Dessert will be some fresh fruit. I’ll just see what looks good at the market and pick up a small assortment.

erev yom kippur lunch menu

Creamy Spinach Soup with Kreplach

Chilean Sea Bass with Morels and Chestnuts

Blood Orange sauce

and/or

Pan Fried “Tofish” with Morels and Chestnuts

Blood Orange Sauce

Steamed Black Rice

baBY Carrots with Orange and Honey

Fresh Fruit

seudah hamafseket menu

The final meal before the fast begins can feel very rushed, especially if you plan to go to synagogue for Kol Nidre, the first service of Yom Kippur that begins just before sundown. It’s one of those things where, if you’re five minutes late, you’ve missed it. But, it’s a holiday dinner and I want it to feel special. To satisfy the parameters of both of these issues, I think serving things that have been made in advance and can be cleaned up quickly is the way to go. We start with hamotzi over a special challah that I make once a year, just for this day. The challah is round, which is the traditional shape for the season. I form it into a crown, to recognize the sovereignty of God, and I top it with little challah birds. The symbolism is that the birds should fly up to the higher realms, bringing our prayers with them on their flight. The birds are actually quite easy to make—for each one, roll a “snake” of dough and tie it into a knot. Now you’ve got a tail on each end of the knot. Flatten one end out and make little cuts, to create a tail with feathers. Manipulate the other end into a round head for the bird, and pull out a point to make the beak. Paint the whole thing with an egg wash. Then, I set a currant, or a piece of a raisin (a whole raisin would be too big) on either side of the head to form an eye.

I’ve learned from experience that the little birds bake faster than the crown, so don’t put them on top until after they’re baked or the birds will burn before the challah is done. A bit of “glue” made from confectioner’s sugar with a bit of water works well—a little extra sweetness is fitting for the holiday season anyway.

I offer two menus here. In some communities and some families, it wouldn’t be Erev Yom Kippur without boiled chicken. In others, all meat is shunned and the meal is dairy. Whichever choice is right for your family, I promise you a simple, satisfying, and enjoyable meal.

The dairy menu includes Yotam Ottolenghi and Sami Tamimi’s recipe for mejadra. There’s no point in me creating my own recipe for this, because their’s can’t be topped. I’m including their recipe for your convenience.

Challah Crown with Birds

labne beet dip

aunt rae’s cheese blintzes

with orange flower essence

mejadra

from ottolenghi and tamimi’s jerusalem cookbook

Israeli Salad

witH fresh herbs and za’atar

Tropical Chia Pudding Parfaits

Challah Crown with Birds

Lima bean hummus

chicken-in-the-pot

Israeli Salad

witH fresh herbs and za’atar

Tropical Chia Pudding Parfaits

Break-Fast

or is it Break Feast?

To me, it wouldn’t be break fast without bagels and lox. One of the reasons it’s such a popular choice is that you don’t have to cook it. We’re walking in the door after Neilah. It’s dark out now. I’m feeling super-charged after a very emotional day. And I’m hungry. I do not want to cook; I want to eat!

I set the table during the afternoon break. When we get home in the evening, all we need to do is warm the bagels, push the button on the coffee-maker, and take the platters out of the fridge. But this doesn’t mean that I haven’t done any cooking.

You know what’s even more fun than spending a few hundred dollars at Russ & Daughters? Making your own gravlax. It’s a little thing I picked up when I was living in Norway, where the word for salmon is laks. It’s very easy to make. You just let it cure in the fridge for a few days and you have a delectable delicate fish that’s a little different from the smoked variety, but equally good. And sometimes it’s fun to have something that’s both familiar and a little different. I’ll serve a Norwegian style cucumber salad alongside of it. One thing I do grab from the appetizing counter is a whitefish. It looks great on a platter golden and glistening with the skin peeled back revealing the smoky white flesh. But it’s a bit fiddly with all those bones, and…the sight of a dead fish kind of creeps out the grandkids, who’ve been raised vegetarian. So, I’ve taken to making my own whitefish salad. It’s both better and cheaper than the store-bought kind. I also make my own vegetable cream cheese. With scallions and radish for bite, carrot and red bell pepper for sweetness, and some fresh dill for…well…because I like dill. It takes very little time and can be made a few days in advance.

There will be plenty of bagel fixings for the non-fish eaters, as well. Everyone loves this pâte of caramelized onions, mushrooms, and cashews. Guacamole has a short shelf life in that it oxidizes quickly, but this avocado spread can be made a day in advance—blending it with a little cream cheese and fresh lime juice stabilizes it and makes it perfect for spreading on a bagel. And for those who’d like a sweet spread, a ricotta with honey and lemon fits the bill nicely.

I often do stuffed eggs, but this year I’m making shakshuka. If you aren’t familiar with it, Shakshuka is an Israeli dish of eggs baked in a tomato-y sauce. I’ll make the base of the dish in advance and when we get home I’ll pour the sauce into my large cast iron skillet, crack in the eggs, and bake it while the bagels are warming.

Everyone is going to be thirsty. I’ll have fruit juices, coffee, an assortment of teas, Prosecco (for mimosas), and chilled coconut water. Dessert, if anyone has room, will be fresh fruit, apple cake, honey cake, and a quart of Hagen Daaz vanilla to top it all off. With all these dishes, this is clearly a spread for a large group. If you’re not feeding so many people, pick and choose your favorites.

post yom kippur break-fast menu

Beverages: coffee, tea, juices, prosecco (for mimosas), coconut water

An assortment of fresh bagels

Homemade vegetable cream cheese

Plain cream cheese

Gravlaks

Agurksalat—Norwegian cucumber salad

Whitefish salad

Mushroom and Cashew pâte

Ricotta whipped with honey and lemon

avocado spread with pignoli, scallions, and lime

A platter of sliced tomatoes, sweet onion, capers, romaine hearts

A platter of assorted cheeses

shakshuka

Fresh fruit

Apple cake

Honey cake

Vanilla ice cream

Tzom Kal—have an easy fast